There are 3 Key Principles that, in any break-up situation, are essential ingredients for a full and sustained recovery and renewal.
These 3 Principles underpin all my work with clients:
1. Emotional balance
No matter what stage you're at in the break-down and/or break-up of a long-term relationship there are ALWAYS emotions involved (unless you're either a great enlightened Saint or a psychopath, and I'm guessing you're neither...).
Dealing with emotions is usually the crucial first step to full recovery and growth. Emotional balance is the bedrock upon which your new life will be built.
And who wants to feel bad any longer than they have to?
It's important for your well-being that you feel clear about the options you have and what's possible - not just for yourself but perhaps for your children and others too.
You will almost certainly need to make new choices now or in the near future, and to do this well you need to be clear what your priorities really are. A bad decision now could create problems for you further down the line. Are you confident you're choosing well?
Together, we'll ensure there's every chance that you are.
Every crisis is an opportunity, even if it hardly feels like that at the moment. To get the best from the opportunity and to grow into a more fulfilling way of life, you need to know what your heart wants and needs. This is the best indicator of your true purpose right now.
Purpose isn't a permanent thing, it changes as you change. In your new situation all kinds of adjustments may be needed, and this includes revising and re-setting what you want and need, now and in the future.
Now more than ever you have the chance to make sure that your life is fulfilled and on purpose.
I work predominantly with clients individually.
If the timing is right then I can also help couples to agree choices pre-separation, or in the very early stages of separation.
If we've not worked together before then we'll start with a FREE Introductory Session.
This will last no more than 30 minutes, and give us both the opportunity to evaluate if we're a good match. It also gives you a flavour of my approach and what it's like to have me as your ally.
The Peace and Purpose Programme
The Peace and Purpose Programme is the core of my work with individual clients. It's where the key choices are made, the greatest understandings are achieved, and where the seeds of real change are sown.
The PPP varies in duration according to need (remember: 'every break-up is unique') and contains elements from a menu of options.
The most important element is the most fundamental: me! I become your very own independent, supportive, experienced and insightful ally who is absolutely committed to YOUR well-being.
As my client, Dorothy, said, "Derek has great insight, gentleness and strength".
Nothing compares to having your own, professional ally.
Sessions are usually by telephone or Skype (or equivalent), though for those local to the Cotswolds in the UK, or willing to travel, face-to-face meetings are possible too.
We'll agree between us a minimum number of sessions (the Programme), with your particular needs and desires as the focus. We'll also agree the main objectives of the programme, and some possible outcomes.
Costs will vary of course, depending on the agreed programme but here's a typical example:
A typical PPP looks like this:
6 x 1 hour 1-2-1 Skype or phone sessions (2 sessions per month for 3 months)
unlimited email communication for the duration of the Programme
my written summary of each session
recommended tasks and actions between sessions
mentoring on appropriate self-development techniques e.g. meditation, mindfulness
supportive accountability for your progress
brief support calls between sessions if required, by negotiation